Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

Why didn't the man jump out of his window when his house was on fire? Because he is afraid of heights.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did one chick in a clothes shop say to another? That's cheap

What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

what is blue purple and has wings what i dont know that why i am asking you

why couldn't the man open the window? he had no hands due to his time serving the USA in vietnam

Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

What do you call a black man riding a plane? A black man riding a plane.

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

When life gives you lemons, sell them. Rejoice in your free money.

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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