What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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A Jew and a Nazi encountered each other on the street. They exchanged pleasant greetings and carried on in their desired directions.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

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A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

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What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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