Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

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Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

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What did the murderer do to the dentist? Nothing, the murderer has served his time and is clean. But he did get his teeth cleaned.

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Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

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#IHateHashtags

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

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What can hitler cook well Steak

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What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

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how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

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Call of Duty is Awesome So is fingering a dead lion with an iron dildo

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The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

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why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

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People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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Yo mama is so so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops