whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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Get off my porch.

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Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

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Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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