An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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What did the Asian see when he went to Youtube.com? Youtube.com

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What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?" The horse cannot understand what the bartender said and instead finds it threatening, so it has a complete spasm and wrecks the whole bar.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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why was the little girl crying? she just watched her whole family get murdered.

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk! Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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Why did the spoon say hi to the fork? To initiate a conversation.

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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Win industrial estate, Newry

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops