How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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5 people are walking

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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black people

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So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

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Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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Roses are red grass is green get on th bed and I'll fill you wilpth my cream ;)

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Why was the woman?

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whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

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Rebecca Black.

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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Why is this joke hilarious? Because it isn't.

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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