Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

know whats funnier than 24? 25.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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