Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Church.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Rick santorum

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A: Knock Knock B: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the fat lady hop on one foot,because she lost the other foot to diabetes. ?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There once was a man from Dundee. He got stung by an angry wasp. He put some Bactine on it. He lied down and took a rest He felt much better the next morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the dog eat its breakfast of meat because he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A ginger was with his friends

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man." The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops