What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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PENIS :)

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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Continents are large islands.

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A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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What is the difference between a black man and a burnt pizza? -Nothing there both black.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

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What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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