Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

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Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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A woman was strolling around town when she turned into a dark alley. She was cold and scared. Suddenly a ferocious looking man jumped out with a knife. The end.

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i wonder when lachlan will come out of the closet and give keiran a blowjob

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

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Alternate ending for children: Despite the massive trauma that the spider suffered from his fall and the sheer volume of rain in the confined space of a pipe, it made a miraculous recover due to the sun coming out. It was however, forever doomed to repeat this cycle of undeath for ever more. [L]

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

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giddy goat

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Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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