why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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What did the little boy with no arms get for cristmas? A football.

i have two hands.

What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

You're mother has had a heart attack in the middle of the street, you start to sing amazing grace hoping people will join in, but unfortunatly this is not a musical and you should call 911.

An owl and a squirrel watch a farmer walk by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls are not capable of human speech. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.

What do u call a banana? A banana......

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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