A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama is so dumb that she failed the SATs

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Andrew's a bald wankstain.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:Whats funnier than 24? A: 25.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a black guy who is a lifeguard An African American male who puts his safety before others

thumb_up thumb_down -3

have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops