What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

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One day a man walked into a wall

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Seven people walk into the same bar, like a solid pole. Ouch!

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

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What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops