Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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Justin Beiber

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OHIO DRIVERS.......THAT IS ALL......

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

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Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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How are a pizza and a jew similar? They both are people aside from the pizza.

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Why couldn't the elephant ride the bike? Because it didn't have a thumb to ring the bell!

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Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer. And a free haircut.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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Two friends go on a hunting trip together. One friend says to the other "Knock, knock." The other friend doesn't respond because he was mauled by a bear.

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why did the black man attend the AA meeting? his wife told him the only way she would stay with him is if he would attend these meetings, he was an alcoholic and is dying of liver failure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops