What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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A boy orders a sandwich at a restaurant. He then questions the cashier about it. Boy: Excuse me, Why is my sandwich so bad? Cashier: Sorry, none of our women cooks were in today.

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The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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Timothy started school at an elementary and was in the fourth grade. His teacher was Ms Bradshaw, and he liked his class. One day as he was going into class, Ms Bradshaw asked everybody, "what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?" Timothy raised his hand and said "the holocaust." The teacher went to her desk and pulled out a desert eagle and shot Timothy five times in the face and raped his dead body

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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how many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? none their all dead.

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

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a 7 year old child is watching a show that involves a c0ck, an ass, a bitch, and a bastard......... However this show is completely appropriate for a 7 year old, what could possibly be inappropriate about a chicken, donkey, dog and an orphan?

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When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

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What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

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Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

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boner

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Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

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What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops