Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the dog crying? Because his owners hated him and called him stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the boy say to the girl seductively eating a banana? A: bananas are my favorite fruit

thumb_up thumb_down +15

all jokes aside...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops