Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

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Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

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What do you call a bad anti joke? And anti joke

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

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How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana Your parents must have little regard for your social identity because they named you after a tropical fruit. Either that or you are clinically insane. I am concerned; please leave.

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Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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What's worse then the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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What's dumber than a black guy that can't read? Two black guys that can't run with TVs.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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how do you make a black person stop drowning you take your boot of his head

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Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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