What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

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what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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you lose.

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

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Whats white? A fridge

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

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A man walks into a bar... he is blind so it isn't funny

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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Whats green and turns red at the push of a button A frog in a blender

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Why did the blonde blow up? She ate a bomb.

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rarw

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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