A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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This is not a joke or is it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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woman's rights

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What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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The WNBA

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I'm hungry.

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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Do you speak alien? Hola.

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A man... walks.

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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A planes crashes on the US-Canada border. The survivors are promptly taken to a hospital nearby to be treated for their injuries.

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Why wouldn't the baby boy stop crying when the babysitter was in the room? Because he put cigarettes out on him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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What do you call a bunch of hobos having sexual intercourse? A soup kitchen

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There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops