What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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the love boat

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

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why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

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What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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What's the capital of Ohio? O

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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