if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the black man get kicked out of his hotel room? He did't pay and was in debt so they couldn't allow him to stay.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven murdered sixes wife and kids and said he was next.

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Whats so funny? That kid has down syndrome

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Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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What do you call an Oliver with friends? A dream

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what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

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How do you save a black man from drowning? I don't know GOOD!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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