Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

NASCAR

what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

I like to slap biitches, I like to slap hoes

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

Asshole huh? Dont give me any ideas. Again you are not high on weed are you? Then that's really bad.

What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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