So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats 2+1? 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the man without a tongue say...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

thumb_up thumb_down +23

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why doesn't Michael J. Fox drive a stick shift? He was raised in an urban area and was only taught to maneuver with vehicles that shifted automatically.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. Racism.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops