What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Doctor, I am afraid of doctors, I dont even dare seek them up. Janitor: Thats quite apparent... Dr.Moral:

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Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

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What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

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Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

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Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? One, they're really capable people, unless they're handi-capped then they'll ask someone else to do it for them.

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I pooped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops