Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

What do Elephants and Grapes have in common? They are both purple, except the Elephant.

What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

The awkward moment when you have cancer.

What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

Ron Paul for President!

What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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