why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

girls lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I dont hate you Lets just say if you were on fire and i had water id drink it

thumb_up thumb_down +24

say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

thumb_up thumb_down +24

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Nicolas Cage's acting.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Wanna know something funny? Your face

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops