What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Woman's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Yes!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Bill: Whats 2 + 2? Joe: Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

3 women are eating popsicles, one is biting, one is licking, and one is sucking, which is married? The one with the wedding ring.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops