whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

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19th amendment

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Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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Zach Barlow

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This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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Guess what! what haha u listened to me

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

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a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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