What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One of them I like to eat, and the other one is a watermelon.

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This sentence is false.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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What do you call a black guy who kills people? A murderer.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

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An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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What do you a call a person who can't fly. A person.

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

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I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

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A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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