Q:What's worse then Finding A Worm in Your apple? A: Realizing how empty your life is.

What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

Guess what.. chicken butt

What did Spiderman do when he saw a crime taking place? He stopped it

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

Tim and Eric

Did the Chicken cross the road? No the road moved the chicken across.

they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon ones a live the other isnt

your mother is so fat that she eats a lot of high fat foods.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

like a cammel, lewis stores his weed in his back

Q: What did the dumb blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? A: Look! Donut seeds!

im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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