why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

What did the black man say when he ate a Hershey bar? Delicious

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

I'm a brony. I'm a brony. I'm a brony. Screw this shit, I'm not a brony anymore. I'm a man. I'm a man. Screw this too. I'm dead, not in bed.

When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Juggling lions and breast feeding.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Gay's rights

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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