Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

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What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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How many dead kittens can you fit into a trunk? -19

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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69

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

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A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

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1+1 =? Too

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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