- Anti Joke

A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

Donald Trump

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster