A man fell off a cliff... He died a vicious death.

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A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a saxaphone playing unicorn, that's flying away to a distant planet on a penguin? a dream

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what happened to the black guy after he turned off the light? he probably wanted to save energy, so he moved to a different room with natural sunlight as a light resource.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops