Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

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pull my finger (farts)

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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*you're

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who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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The american education system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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