A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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