Yesterday, I was assasinated.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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