Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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