Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...