One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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what is white on top and black on bottom Society What is black on top and white on bottom Rape

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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i saw amango it splootered

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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