race-car = rac-ecar

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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