What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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