Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

David Cameron

thumb_up thumb_down -23

2 people lived next door to each other. The man said "hi" and so did the other man. What is wrong with this situation. Nothing, just friendly neighbors.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the mexican do when 3 INS workers came to his house? He showed them his papers and it turns out he was a natural born US citizen. The mexican then proceeded to invite the INS into his home for a cup of coffee but they respectfully declined

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops