Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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civil rights

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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And you honored it I see :P

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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