Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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What did your Little brother get for Christmas? Lice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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