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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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