Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

Sex

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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