Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

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A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

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What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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