Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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