Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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