Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Ross.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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