Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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you will like this because i am black.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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