So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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The tooth fairy, Santa and, Justin Beiber are the same, little kids believe in them, whats wrong with America these days

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

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—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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