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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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