What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Cripples are lame.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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