What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Cripples are lame.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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