Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

what's funny about war? nothing!

Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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