Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

what do you call your mama at the gas station

Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

Rebecca Black's career.

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

How old is victor? Half past dead

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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