Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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What's an example of something quiet? Helen Keller.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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