My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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