Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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Andoni was here

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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