Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

So a bar walks into a man...

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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