What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

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what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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