why did the man beat his wife? why not?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

69.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...