Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

Do you like apples? Yes

roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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