i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Justin Bieber

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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