Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -4

baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops