Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops