Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

womens rights

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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