What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...