A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops