I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssLOLIAMINTHESIDEBAR:Dyouaregaylol

Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

What was a hard time for people? the great depression

Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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