What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops