Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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A brunette, a blond and a red-head decide to go swimming in a lake. To prepare, they go shopping together to get some new bikinis. When they get to the shop they are pleased to find that the bikinis are on sale and they get them 50% off. They drive with their new swimwear to the lake and get changed in the changing room. When they get out they notice that it is quite cold. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice that the lake is dirty. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice the lake is actually a spill of oil. They decide to go swimming anyway. They remember that none of them can swim. They decide to go swimming anyway. They jump in. They drown.

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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What's 9+10? 19

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What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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8================D-------- (.Y.)

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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