Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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